Gaslighting is one of the most insidious tactics a narcissist uses.

 It’s not just lying — it’s a slow, deliberate erosion of your reality. Bit by bit, they twist your words, your memories, and even your emotions until you start doubting yourself.

I remember that confusion all too well.

 Hearing phrases like:

“You’re too sensitive.”

“That never happened.”

“You’re imagining things.”

Each time, I questioned myself more. I started wondering if maybe I was too emotional or remembering wrong. That’s the devastating power of gaslighting — it doesn’t just distort your reality; it steals your sense of self.

But let me say this clearly:

 You are not crazy.

 You are not imagining it.

 And you are definitely not alone.

What Gaslighting Really Is

Gaslighting is emotional manipulation designed to make you question what you know to be true.

 It’s subtle, quiet, and often disguised as care or concern.

A narcissist doesn’t want a partner — they want control.

 They want to shape how you see the world, how you see them, and ultimately how you see yourself.

The goal is always the same:

 To dominate your emotions, your confidence, and your decisions until you can’t tell where you end and they begin.

What Narcissists Say to Gaslight You

You might recognise some of these phrases — and if you do, it’s not because you’re fragile. It’s because you’ve been conditioned to doubt yourself.

1. “You’re overreacting.”

Translation: Your emotions make me uncomfortable, so I’ll invalidate them.

 This teaches you that expressing feelings equals drama — so you silence yourself to keep the peace.

2. “That never happened.”

Translation: I’m rewriting history to protect my image.

 They deny conversations or actions you remember vividly, leaving you questioning your own memory.

3. “You’re too sensitive.”

Translation: If I mock your emotions, I don’t have to own mine.

 They weaponise your empathy, turning your humanity into a flaw.

4. “Everyone else thinks you’re the problem.”

Translation: I’ve already started rewriting the narrative behind your back.

 By manipulating how others see you, they isolate you from the very people who might help you see the truth.

5. “I was only joking.”

Translation: Cruelty becomes comedy when I don’t want consequences.

 Humiliation wrapped in humour still hurts — and it’s meant to.

6. “You always twist things.”

Translation: You’re getting too close to exposing me.

 When you start making sense, they accuse you of being the manipulator. It’s projection — their favourite defence.

7. “You need help.”

Translation: If I make you question your sanity, I stay in control.

 They paint themselves as the rational one, framing your emotional reactions as instability.

The Psychology Behind the Gaslight

Gaslighting works because it attacks your most fundamental sense — your trust in yourself.

At first, you defend yourself. Then you explain. Then you doubt. Then you apologise.

 That’s the trap.

Every phrase is designed to:

• Confuse you
• Undermine you
• Make you rely on them for clarity

And once they control the story, they control you.

How to Protect Yourself

1. Write it down.

 Document everything — dates, words, messages. Gaslighters rely on your confusion; clarity is your defence.

2. Trust your feelings.

 Confusion, guilt, and anxiety after every conversation are not coincidences — they’re symptoms of manipulation.

3. Stop explaining yourself.

 You can’t reason with someone committed to misunderstanding you. Step back instead of spiralling.

4. Rebuild your reality.

 Spend time with people who remind you who you are. Gaslighting thrives in isolation but dies in connection.

You Are Not Broken

Gaslighting doesn’t happen because you’re weak. It happens because you’re empathetic — because you believed in love, honesty, and the idea that people mean what they say.

You can’t beat a narcissist by fighting harder.

 You win by seeing clearly — by reclaiming your truth and walking away from the game entirely.

So, let’s name it out loud.

 Let’s stop normalising emotional manipulation.

 And let’s remind each other:

You are not broken.

 You are not too much.

 You are enough.

 Always have been. Always will be. 🖤

 If this resonates with you, dive deeper in

 👉 The Narcissist Handbook: Recognise the Narcissist, The Lies, Love Bombing, and Manipulation That Break You

 Available now on Amazon and Kindle Unlimited.